look at the stars, how they shine for you;

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Thursday, February 23, 2006

should be sleeping but i ended up reading all the past letters i recieved from my friends and well, ex-s.
i realised that in all my past relationships.. i am the one with the problem. the one that caused each relationship to end bitterly. each and everyone of them were so sweet. fihi wrote great, touching poems that always make me blush and smile silly to myself. e1 remembers everything, every event, the exact date and time we did stuffs together. these are all so super sweet. and yet, i found fault with each and everyone of them. intiated a breakup and caused so much friction between myself and them. what exactly am i trying to do..? trying to like spoil every relationship that i could ever have? it is not like i have a lot of suitors. which i dont.. actually.. quite sad.
seriously. it is always me. me me me.
i have this love-hate relationship with my past. somehow.. going through them make me laugh my head off and smile to myself like some kind of perv. but they also make me bawl my head off like a baby. thinking back and regretting what i did in the past. and thinking about what it would be like if i didnt do those stupid silly stuff.
whatever. seriously. SIGHS. i would just have to accept it. really need to find someone to talk to now! arghh. but i just cant bring myself to disturb anyone @ this hr.. over such trival stuff. shall talk to ting dear tmr before movie-ing then.
baaahhh! what a random entry.
back to reading my diary.

jazz it up baby.
2:00 AM

CHERIEE:)
loves ashley
clubbing
np mass comm

WISHLIST:)
GO FIND OUT YOURSELF

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